HOPE

After trying to get pregnant the "old fashioned" way for over a year, we decided we needed to get serious. Don't get me wrong, we were serious before. It's just that at this point we decided it was time to bring in an expert. I had talked to my GYN at my appointment in March and she did run some blood tests to check my hormones. Everything came back great and our next step was a SA for my sweet hubby! He had just started a new job and so we waited for things to be more convenient so he didn't have to leave work early. Fast forward to this fall.

We scheduled our first appointment with our RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist). We immediately loved him. He explained several possibilities or areas that could be a problem and scheduled further testing. I was worried that it could just be that I was getting too old. I'm only 38, but my uterus could feel older...thankfully she doesn't! The RE told us that even with my age, it shouldn't be this hard for us to get pregnant. That there is obviously something else going on. After our tests it was determined that the something else going on is lazy sperm. :) They look great, but they just don't want to get the job done.

In order to help these guys out, the Dr put me on Clomid. I take the Clomid for 5 days to help increase the number of eggs that are released. Then sometime next week we will go into the office and I'll have an IUI (Intrauterine Insemination). We are hoping this does the trick. I know the success rates aren't huge and we may have to pursue some other form of treatment. I want to be soooo positive, but I am also guarding my heart against another BFN (big fat negative) pregnancy test. I've had all too many of those over the last year and a half.

This baby journey is such a roller coaster ride. If you haven't been through it, it's really hard to understand. Believe me...I know! I used to be a woman who had friends with fertility issues and certainly felt bad for them, but also never understood their pain. I love kids...for crying out loud, I spend all day with them! I enjoy spending all day with them. I just honestly can't imagine my life without having children. At the same time I know God is good and He does have a perfect plan for us. Whether it works out this way, through another type of fertility treatment or through adoption someday; I truly don't care! ha! I want to be a mom and can't imagine that I will be denied that desire. So I hope....I hope this IUI works. I hope it happens the first time. I hope this brings me closer to my husband. I hope this journey allows me to help others as some friends who've went through this help me now. I hope!

New Fall Shows

I'm not a tv junkie, but I do have a few shows that I hate to miss. I DVR most of my shows and then watch them Friday night while Barry is out officiating football games. Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice and Brothers and Sisters were my favorite three. This year, I've added a couple new ones to my lineup. I really enjoy The Good Wife and then there's NCIS: Los Angeles.....Have you seen NCIS: LA??? Not only is it action packed, it's packed with a couple of great looking guys! Chris O'Donnell and LL Cool J.

Need I say more???

Do you have any favorite shows?

Gratitude

During a discussion in our small group Sunday night, someone mentioned gratitude journals. A couple people said they have gratitude journals, others know people that have one. In the journal you list things each day you are thankful for, but not the same thing twice. I decided that I want to start a gratitude journal. I believe this will help me become more aware of the little things. Many times each day, I overlook the people or occurrences that God places in front of me because they might be insignificant to me. I realized I need to look at things more closely and really appreciate how blessed I am.

I spent a lot of time thinking this week, but didn't actually start my journal until today. I've been thinking about how many things I have to be grateful for. I want to make sure and focus on these things instead of worrying about the negative stuff. I have struggles, there are things I want to happen that don't happen in my time. But, I also know it's not my time that's important.... God's timing is what counts! That's something I pray about daily. :)
The bottom line is that I am blessed!!

I'm going to list some of the things I'm thankful for on my blog every now and then. Just so when I look back, I can remember that I do have so many blessings and am truly grateful...even for the little things.


"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude."
~Denis Waitley

Things I Am Grateful for Today:

1. The fact that I have a student in my class that makes me laugh everyday after rest time when he says, "Wakey, wakey, eggs and bacey." He says it with such excitement that we can't all help but join in with him!

2. That my husband is a man that I am so proud of not just today, but every single day.

3. The sun came out for just a bit today after weeks of rain.


What are you grateful for today?

Paprika!!

I love Vera Bradley! I am in love with the new Paprika collection!

It is so fallish and will be great for all seasons. I just might have to order something. Hopefully at some point I can order this. Barry and I had our first appointment with our Reporduction Endocrinologist last week. We have a game plan and I am excited to be moving forward. Hopefully with the combination of Clomid and IUI good news will follow. I will post more on this soon.

I Miss This Guy!

I realize it's been 3 months since I've posted...lots going on and nothing going on. Does that make sense. Life seems to be flying by. I plan to start posting again on a regular basis soon. Until then I leave you with some pictures I took this summer of my nephew. He turned two while I was in Michigan...and to say he's all boy is the perfect description of him!

Watching the bubbles ...he's so serious

Love that smile!

He loved the sand...look at those curls! I love them!